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Thursday, July 13, 2006
I'll sell you my first born for a cookie
she'll be a delight. you won't even notice she's there. well...
~until you ask her to get dressed....and she has a full-blown fit because she wants to wear this dress to camp and you want her to wear sensible CAMP clothing.
~until you are trying to blow your hair DRY and she comes in and runs your brush (the one you are using) under the water so she can flatten her hair
~until you are giving her breakfast and she can't handle the fact that you won't allow her to eat froot loops in the family room. (or any other meal, for that matter)
~until the meal is over and is begging you for dessert. "i want dessert! i want dessert! i want dessert!" for half an hour straight.
~until you want to put something on tv for her and the ONLY thing she wants to watch is Beverly Hills, 90210.
~until you try to get a word in edge-wise but she doesn't let you because her mouth doesn't close. ever.
~until you lock yourself in your room to try to get two minutes of peace to use the bathroom and check your email and she goes into the nursery and presents herself on the monitor "um...i don't think you are, like, listening to me. i have a problem. i think it's time we consider getting rid of joshie."
~until she wants you to put her hair in a bun...but clearly your buns aren't good enough. so she cries about it.
~until you tell her that she can't come into your room, so she pounds on the door and kicks and screams until you let her in out of fear of her kicking the door down.
~until you want to put her to bed and she wants 5 more minutes, a story, her songs, 5 more minutes, fill up her water, wait...stay and snuggle for one more minute, another minute, wait, my stomach's hurting me, joshie hurted my leg at camp, i need you to cut my toenails....

hmm...i'm doing going to be able to sell her, am i?
shoot, and i am dying for a cookie this morning, too.

I'm a displaced American writer, mom, and wife living in Canada who muses about my life, my kids, my tv watching and my slight obsession with celebrities.
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Reading Lolita in Tehran * Azar Nafisi
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close * Jonathan Safran Foer
i bet you look good on the dance floor * arctic monkeys
the skin of my yellow country teeth * clap your hands say yeah
chasing cars * snow patrol
movie script ending * death cab for cutie
anthems for a 17-year-old girl * broken social scene
all these things that I've done * the killers
one more night (your ex-lover remains dead) * stars
a little less 16 candles a little more touch me * fall out boy
the great salt lake * band of horses
october, first account * be your own pet
mushaboom * feist
letter from an occupant * new pornographers

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