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Friday, April 29, 2005
lunchtime...
as i sit and eat my matzah and cream cheese...forcing everyone who walks by to stop and stare...covering myself in crumbs and more crumbs...i can't help but wonder..

could it get any worse than this?
I loathe this holiday.
Funny of the Day (you knew there had to be one about Tom and Katie...)
"I think every little girl dreams about her wedding. I used to think I was going to marry Tom Cruise."

ha! it's from the personal quote section of Katie's Bio on IMDB.com
TV Round-up
The OC

i guess there are some benefits to living in Canada. While The Oc was preempted in the states, i got to watch it in good ole' Canada. And Holy Crap! what an episode!

here's a short recap for those of you who didn't get to see it:
The nana calls from Miami and says she's getting married. Sandy panics and takes Seth and Ryan down to Florida to do some damage control. Sandy confronts the nana's fiance by telling him that he trusts him that he's not out to get Nana's money. Then he breaks up with the nana. boring.

Seth becomes an old man and plays shuffleboard with the all old men in the fountainbleu. then he goes up against this blond, very leggy girl who was in town visiting her grandmother. when seth loses, he challenges her to a rematch, and when he loses, she "forces" him to lick whipped cream off of her body for a chance to win $5000. big problem? it's televised, and Summer sees it. while she is at zach's house. eating gnocci. that he cooked for her. and THEN SHE KISSES HIM!!! ah!

Marissa offers to help Trey while Ryan's away. She helps him get a job and then they celebrate with margaritas. and then Trey gets Marissa drunk and takes her to the beach and practically rapes her. she hits him with a stick and leaves him bleeding in the sand.

Carter tells Kirsten that he's leaving Newport for a new job. They celebrate at the Cohen residence and CArter tells her that he didn't want to leave. her. not newport. and THEN THEY KISS. she says "good luck with your new job, Carter" and then he leaves. Then Kirsten turns to the vodka. the good old vodka.

i think that's it....

Survivor

~How come the women on Survivor can NEVER get their freakin' acts together?? if the 4 women booted off the 3 men, they could have had their first all female final four. and didn't dumb-ass Caryn realize that 1 in 4 is a better shot than letting Tom place her as the 6th man. what a dumbass!!! i can't even believe it. they all should have voted her in the end. she deserved to get the boot. not my Stephenie. i'm NOT happy.

~I'm not a big Katie fan but she was dead-on when she said that it would never work because Caryn sucks.

~Ian and Gregg bathe each other! ha!

~loved the reward challenge. i cried a little bit.

~I liked Tom until he gave his little, "oh, don't vote me off because i'm amazing. i'm smart and i'm strong." just for that crap he should have been given the boot.


Apprentice

~I, for one, thoroughly enjoy the Craig and Kendra catfights. I hope it's them in the final two.

~Okay, I'm usually a huge Tana fan...but the bedazzler? i mean, come on. and their needless trip to Staten Island reminded me a little bit too much of Stephanie's venture into Brooklyn to deviver pizzas. I thought Tana was making her exit last night. but, she gave good defense, and Trump fired Alex. oh, and Tana, sweetie, of course no one had the bedazzler...because they haven't been sold since 1988.

~33 shirts? how the hell did they only sell 33 shirts?

~who else laughed when they bleeped the word, "Butthole"??
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Sienna Miller...
gotta love the nipple slip.... :)
I'm a Lover, Not a Fighter
lifted from ReviewGuru:

Aphrodite
Aphrodite/Eros


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
I guess you can call me the photocopy bee-otch
um..yes...so yesterday i came back from my "vacation" to 6 straight hours of photocopying and sorting. clearly, instead of doing some of it herself, my boss waited until i came back to let me take care of all of it for her 2pm meeting.

so today, when i thought all of this was over, another freelancer came over to me to ask me to do HER photocopying. um. hello? she can't do her own copying??? Why do i now have to do hers as well as mine?

THIS WAS NOT IN MY JOB DESCRIPTION
Juicy Bits and Pieces
~~Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise?!!!
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the two were photographed holding hands in Rome and Cruise's rep has confirmed that Tom and Katie are dating.

~~Is anyone else thrilled that Patrick Dempsey made People's 50 Most Beautiful People list?

~~Constantine was given the boot on American Idol last night. i, for one, was shocked (not as shocked as a weepy Paula Abdul, though). not so much because i thought he was good (because i don't) but i think that Anthony and Scott needed to go home before him. but, don't feel too bad for the guy - his band, Pray for the Soul of Betty, has already been signed to a record deal.

~~
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Wednesday, April 27, 2005
Highlights of My Trip...
1) the husband took the boy to the bathroom in the airport. my son turns to his daddy and says, "Wow, Daddy, you have a big penis!"

2) I saw Brandon (from TAR5) in the airport!!
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yes, that guy. and he was really really good looking in person. yum.
A Mom Vent
Well, where do i even begin?
our trip started out on a bad note...with the husband and i not even speaking to each other. when we woke up in the morning (and were leaving the house at 8:30 am) i realized that i had left my Canadian citizenship card at my office. which, in a nutshell, meant that if i didn't have it, i would not be able to get back into the country. so, we hopped in the car and raced to my office.

i should have taken it as a sign. our trip was doomed from the start.

To put it bluntly, there's something wrong with my mother.
I've known it for years, but I only recently realized what is actually wrong with her.

My mother is a 2-year-old, living in a 56-year-old body.

She's married to her job, and that's about it. she has a high profile job and works 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and doesn't take any breaks. so...she tends to miss out on the good things in life - her family, her friends, her grandchildren because work is her #1 priority.

so, deciding to have her three kids and two grandchildren at her house for passover was clearly a mistake. for the past 7 years or so, she's just booked us all into a hotel and not had to deal with it. and before that, my grandmother was alive and cooked and cleaned everything so all my mother had to do was show up to the seders.

this year was a bit different. she decided to cook some and cater some. now, my mother is NOT a good cook. she thinks she's a fantastic cook, though. there are a few things that she makes, but most of them come out somewhat sub-par.

so, needless to say, she was stressed out when we arrived. i didn't get a "how are you feeling?" or even a "wow - you've really grown since i've seen you last!" not even a single acknowledgement that i am 6 months pregnant.

and she still can't handle the way we discipline our children. of course, i know that it's a grandmother's job to spoil grandchildren. i know this, without a doubt. that's not what bothers me. it's that when i am allowing my child to scream in her bed, or when i refuse to sit with my daughter while she pees, or when i refuse to back down when she wants to wear her tutu outside, my mother gets all weird and quiet and starts muttering under her breath. what the hell is she thinking? does she think when she does this i'm going to say, "oh, you're right. i know nothing about parenting. i'm a horrible mother. i'm going to change my ways and begin to parent like you." um, i don't think so. she is one person i will not take parenting advice from. mostly because i don't think she's a very good parent.

i could go on and on, but i will spare you all.
i think i need some major therapy.
Istanbul was Constantinople..
..is anyone else still singing that in their heads??

~~Uchenna and Joyce were robbed. again. no first place prize...again? what the hell? "Where's my princess?" i love Uchenna.

~~Gretchen's voice still bugs. "Scales. Scales" i feel badly for them since they seem to have trouble seeing things at EVERY TASK. but, she stormed the castle, and i was impressed!

~~Ron and Kelly make me laugh. Kudos to Ron for taking her "getting out of the military comment" so easily. and he totally rocked the columns task. but he needs to stop saying "Dang" and "Golly."

~~I LOVE how in turkey the taxis are called "Taksis"

~~Karma is a bitch, Rob. I love you. but you were stupid. earlier flight. he.

~~Jerome the Gnome. That's the funniest thing that's EVER come out of Meredith's mouth. and did anyone else find it weird that Phil kept calling it a 'Nam?
the goods:
Vonzell - she's very good. very. very. good. and i loved her shout out to her dad.
Bo - I'm usually not a huge Bo fan...but i love love love this song and thought he did great. he still needs a stylist. the glasses were all Simon could comment on? how about that horrible poncho he was sporting?

the mehs:
Carrie - she should have nailed this. A country girl singin' a country song.

the bads:
Scott - i don't really have anything else to say other than that was bad. bad. bad.
Constantine - what was with the kicks?? he keeps forgetting that Bo is their rocker, and Constantine is their "crooner"
Anthony - um...he sounded okay...but Celine Dion? really?

bottom 3 will be: Anthony, Scott, and Carrie...Scott goes home.
Thursday, April 21, 2005
On Vacation...
yes, you heard that right.
although spending Passover at my mother's is not exactly the vacation i had in mind....

i will be back on Wednesday :)
come on, admit it, you'll miss me.
Behold, the Caesar’s Bath meme!
List five things that people in your circle of friends or peer group are wild about, but you can’t really understand the fuss over. To use the words of Caesar (from History of the World Part I), “Nice. Nice. Not thrilling . . . but nice."

Here's my list of what I say is OK but my friends and peer group swear are AMAZING. in other words, 5 things that i think are completely overrated:

1) All Your Base Are Belong To Us.
for some reason this is a huge joke among some of my friends, who get gigantic kicks out of all the spin-offs, i.e., all your smurfs are belong to smurf.

2) Deuce Bigelow, Male Gigolo. and other Saturday Night Live-type movies.
they just are NOT funny. i'm sorry.

3) Fruit-y martninis or drinks.
ew. i think cosmopolitans are so nasty. and just because they were made famous by Sex and the City doesn't automatically make them delicious :)

4)iPods
i just don't think they are all that exciting. my sister in law hit the nail right on the head. When do i listen to music? when i'm in the car....so, i have no need for an ipod then, and when i'm exercising....and at the gym all the machines have tvs.

5) ER
i cannot bring myself to watch this show. it jumped the shark about 3 seasons ago when Mark Green died. it's SOOOO bad now. i'd so much rather take my medical drama watching elsewhere and watch Grey's Anatomy, because, well...Patrick Dempsey is delish.

This meme is by invite only, and I'm inviting Stacy, Beth and the Aitch.
Week 25 - Preggo Update
i've officially discovered the key to my happiness. it's the old navy perfect v-neck in a size medium:
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oh...it's amazing. fitted enough that i don't look like i'm wearing a muumuu, and short enough that it doesn't come down to my knees. ah! as close as i'm getting to heaven these days.


so..my biggest issue these days seems to be finding a name for this child if it's a boy. we have a great girl name. but for a boy? nothing. and the two names i like i can't use. the first is Jackson, and we'd call him Jack, but, alas, it's my father in law's name. the second is Joseph, but, alas, this one belongs to my brother in law. cripes.

help!! i'm begging you. help us name this child!
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Question of the Day
from poplicks:

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Who has a better shot of winning the presidency: Condoleeza Rice or Hillary Clinton?
"If you're so depressed, how come you're eating pizza?"
that's one of my favorite Corey Haim quotes ever (it's from Lucas - i won't make ya'll guess)

looks like Corey's been eating quite a fair bit of pizza these days.
check out this video. warning. it may scare you.

perhaps he's eaten Corey Feldman
There's far too much bunching in India...
~~Could there be anything funnier than Gretchen sitting on top of that elephant, whining her head off? I swear i almost peed my pants a little. her screaming needs to stop. it's annoying the crap out of me.

~~I LOVE Joyce. she's so awesome. I was crying when she was getting her head shaved. but, i must say, her hair needed to go. she looked better bald! and think about the gorgeous extensions she can buy with her million dollars!! And why or why didn't they win a first place prize?? they totally deserved one.

~~Lynn wanting to drink his toner had me in stitches. but, i'm still happy they are gone. i've had just about enough of their "honeys"

~~Can't wait for next week when Kelly so smartly puts that Ron "gets out" of his committment to the military by being a POW. genius.
Alex Trebek likes American Idol!!
the goods:
Carrie - oy. Simon's right. her look is TERRIBLE. barbie doll/stepford wife was right on! but she sang beautifully last night.
Vonzell - she gets better every week. and she takes risks. i really like her.
Anwar - i thought he was pretty good. definitely more lively than he's been.

the mehs:
Constantine - what was with all that eye make-up?? AND he took the tongue out again. sheesh. put that thing back, please.
Bo - what was with Bo's hair tonight? it looked worse than usual (how IS that even possible??) i thought he was just a'ight.

the bads:
Scott - now he's not only scary, but he's boring as hell too. someone put this guy out of his misery (aaron...i hope you didn't think he was good last night!!)
Anthony - ew. no. go home, please.

bottom three? my guess is Scott, Anwar and Anthony. Scott goes home.
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
i'm a thief!!
and i'm damn proud of it.

Haley helped me do it. my chair has been so bad lately - it's been killing my back...oh...since about june.

so, i took matters into my own hands and did a little switcheroo. we were very sneaky about it. no one seems to have noticed.

let's hope!!
This just in...
Rob and Amber tied the knot on Saturday:

their elaborate wedding took place on Atlantis at sunset on the beach with a lavish poolside reception for about 200. Atlantis, by the way, is the resort that Rob and Amber coincidentally won a trip to during the second leg of The Amazing Race. (This will certainly fuel the conspiracy theories; since CBS is airing the wedding, perhaps they gave them the trip just to save money!).

and Alicia Keys has chest hair:

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ew.
I NEED YOU! (that's for all you people who NEVER comment!)
lifted from Stacy (of course...she's where i get all my good stuff!)

An interactive TV show meme:

a. Post a list of 10 TV fandoms/shows you follow (current or cancelled!)
b. Have your friends list guess your favorite CHARACTER from each show
c. When guessed bold the line and write a sentence about why you like that
character

1. Survivor - Giblet and Sean were right on this one, but i'll give it to Giblet, since he spelled Stephenie right!! :) i love her. what can i say?
2. Wonder Years - Misty is right. Paul is my favorite. he was the most lovable dork on tv.
3. Beverly Hills, 90210
4. Growing Pains
5. Dawson's Creek - Giblet was right...again...my favorite is Joey. mostly because she's exactly like i am...
6. The OC
7. Sex and the City
8. Sopranos
9. Desperate Housewives - of course...it's Bree Van de Camp. i love everything about her...from her one-liners (that are so excellantly delivered) to her clothing. love her.
10. Scrubs - Sean and Giblet got JD. this one was a giveaway. i'm in LURVE with ZAch Braff.


****Come on..no one?? no one wants to take a stab?? i'm beginning to understand what Beth is going through with her blog paranoia....
Monday, April 18, 2005
Some Strange News...
Rumor has it that Brad Pitt is dating again.
Wanna take a stab? (and no, it's NOt Angelina)???

Okay...since you are NEVER going to guess it...i'll give you a hint:

she's a widow.
her husband was an American Journalist.
she was pregnant when he was killed.
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it seems that Brad Pitt's been dating Mariane Pearl, the widow of Daniel Pearl. hmm...that seems rather curious to me...
Why I'm On Top of the World Today...
1. my daughter is wearing jeans today. it's a monumentous occasion. right about the time she turned 2, she decided that she wasn't wearing pants OF ANY KIND anymore. so, i had to go out and buy her skirts. then, right around 3 1/2, she decided that she would wear "soft pants" which, essentially, are velour pants. but that's it. no jeans or khakis at all. but there's nothing cuter than a little girl in jeans. last week she decided, "mommy, i like jeans again!" What? who? what? i ran out and bought her the cutest jeans i could find. i'm a very happy mommy today :)

2. it's warm enough outside to get a sunburn. and i've got one to prove it.

3. i look hot today, even though i'm 24 weeks pregnant.

4. i've made peace with my dying jeep.

5. i didn't gain ANY weight over the weekend, even though i ate like an absolute heifer.
"No wonder you're a pervert. Look who your parents are!"
~~My hate lessened for Lynette this week. i actually enjoyed her storyline, and didn't want to wring her neck at the end of the hour. maybe it was the absence of her annoying kids.

~~when Bree said, "i would love you even if you were a murderer..." um..Amdrew is, actually, a murderer. He killed Mama Solis even if it was kind of indirectly....:)

~~Andrew is EVIL.

~~I still get a good chuckle every time John calls Gabrielle Mrs. Solis. I mean, the guy is SLEEPING with her. it's probably safe to move on to a first name basis with her!

~~Susan and her mother need to go far, far away.

~~ew. Susan's legs are scary. Someone give her a sandwich. pronto.
Friday, April 15, 2005
Four For Friday
Q1: What are your favorite sections of a bookstore?
the bestseller section, the children's section (of course...gotta check out the competition...) and I love the bargain section.

Q2: If you knew for certain that it would extend your life expectancy by 8 years, would you reduce your daily caloric intake by 30%?
in a heartbeat. a small price to pay for 8 more years with my family.

Q3: If you have Caller ID on your phone, do you answer incoming calls from people you know any differently than from people whose number's you do not recognize, or do you just say "Hello" in the same tone and inflection regardless of who it is that's calling? If you do not have Caller ID, are there times when you wish you did?
i usually answer the same way. unless it's the husband or something and then i just say "hi"

Q4: When eating a meal, do you eat a little of each item until you're done with everything on your plate, or do you eat each item one at a time until that item has been completely consumed, and then move on to the next item on your plate? Regardless of which way you do it, do you think it's odd when you see someone else doing it the other way?
i eat a little bit of everything until i'm done. i think everyone's eating habits are weird (including my own), and i try not to look at other people while they're eating :)
il mio european interno è italiano




Your Inner European is Italian!






Passionate and colorful.
You show the world what culture really is.

Holy Chunk Blowing, Batman.
so, i get this urgent message from the husband to call him at work.
my worst fears have come true.
"They called from Emily's school."
by this point, i already knew what he was going to say.
"She puked in class."

oh, man.
i'm absolutely beside myself. i should go home and be with her. but, i'm afraid.
she's - of course - 100% unaffected by the entire ordeal.

i'm sitting here. my heart's racing. my stomach's gurgling.
i need some Xanax.
Thursday Night Tv - Wahoo!
Survivor

~~Katie still bugs. especially now that she's doing a whole lotta lyin'. how long do you think it will take before she eats Janu? i saw her eyeing everyone's food last night.

~~Coby? Honey? those were some mighty expensive donuts, buddy! one million dollar donuts to be exact. you NEVER jump off first.

~~Jeff is right, Ian. Yes, you are mildly endearing (except for the fact that you are slightly cross-eyed), but NOBODY wants to see you strip for food. Anyone else hoping that Jeff would strip? He looked extra good last night!

~~Is there anybody out there who doesn't think Stephenie should win this whole damn thing? she totally deserves it! How much do you love her? when she said "I hope I don't cry when I see them. They'll be like, 'What is wrong with this lunatic psycho?'" i was all teary-eyed!

~~I'm surprised at Tom's low tolerance for alcohol...and I think he was still drunk the next day when he was slurring his words all over Steph.

Apprentice


~~Ha! Chris cries! What a woman! and i about died when he said: "Losing seven in a row is the most insane experience in my life!" He did manage to keep his cool in the boardroom.

~~"He's a virgin and we're all sluts!" - how much do you ADORE Tana?? and when she said, "What the hell's this doing in my bed?" and there was zero explanation afterwards? classic!

~~interiorally and exteriorally...Chris makes up words...yeah, well so does everyone else on the show!

~~Alex = lazy-ass

~~I'm loving the tension between Craig and Kendra. I would love to see them go head to head in the final 2.

note: i didn't get to watch the OC yet...well, i saw the first 20 minute and then fell asleep. so, i will recap later :)
Thursday, April 14, 2005
The Federlines Take Baskin Robbins :)
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oooh...just a few more scoops and she'll be fatter than i am.
I. Can't. Wait.

eat up the ice cream, Britney!
A Plea
please. please. please. stop voting for Scott Savol.
please.
A Wednesday Night Out
Last night my friend Michelle's mom got us free passes to see a sneak preview of the new Amanda Peet and Ashton Kutcher movie, "A Lot Like Love."

It was, in fact, a lot like other movies you've seen. think Serendipity (except in this one, we don't get to see Jeremy Piven) - where the main characters meet again years later. think Say Anything - where Kutcher pulls a very John Cusack-ish move but instead of a gigantic boom box, he uses a guitar and a horrid singing voice.
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think When Harry Met Sally - where the main characters complain about their significant others. think Boys and Girls - where two friends deal with the whole intimacy thing.

Kutcher is a big dope, who can't get out of his That 70's Show role. But Amanda Peet is beautiful, and she was enjoyable to watch. and any movie that has Taryn Manning in it is okay by me (well, maybe not this one). I went in realizing that i was seeing an Ashton Kutcher movie...and that it couldn't possibly be all that great. but, i enjoyed it. i'm sure glad that i didn't pay for it, though.
Rage Against the Jeep
Today is the first day that i'm actually angry at my jeep.
I've been able to deal with the stalls at red lights. granted, i'm not happy about them...but i've been calm, turned on my hazards, and kept trying and trying until it started up again and i could get home (for the record, in the last week this has happened at least half a dozen times..)

but, this morning, she stalled on the highway. in the middle of the freakin' highway. so, now, i'm absolutely TERRIFIED to drive her. it was so scary. i was not as calm as i'd like to have been...but i think i should be given a little lee-way since there were gigantic honking trucks coming at me at 75 mph. yikes!

this car needs replacing. pronto.
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
I'm in Photocopying Hell..
Somebody please save me.
i've been doing copies. and copies. and copies. and, oh, yes, you guessed it...more copies.

for the last 3 hours. help!!
"Do you have a senior citizen's discount?"
~~the three most unintentionally hilarious moments of the night: a) Phil's ginormous eyebrow lift as he told Rob and Ambuh that the leg wasn't over and b) when the crowd was cheering and clapping for Gretchen and Meredith and c) when Rob said, "watch out for the cows" and the camera panned to Kelly.

~~Rob is awesome. What on earth made Ron and Kelly listen to him and NOT yield them. they are so dumb. and Rob knew it and took advantage. Go ROB! and i thought it was a good move of them NOT to yield anyone.

~~And Ron...is there any place in the world that DOESN'T look like Baghdad to you?

~~I'm still loving Uchenna and Joyce. and still annoyed by Lynn and Alex.

~~kind of just a "meh" episode for me. I miss Brian and Greg. I liked the tea task - but everything else was kind of boring. Next week looks much better.
Paula - sit the f$%^%k down already!! Someone...
please check the poor woman into a clinic...

the goods:
Vonzell - she keeps getting better and better each week. i thought she was great.
Carrie - i still think she's great. she's not a rocker, but she was still good. i like that she tried to change it up.
Anwar - i thought he was really good. but, how about some songs sung by MEN?
Constantine - dare i put him in the good category??!! he was good last night. even Simon called him "astonishing" he loses points for sticking out his tongue. gak!

the mehs:
Bo - just "eh"
Anthony - good song. much much better than last week. still not good enough.

the bads:
Nadia - Randy made me laugh so hard when he didn't even know what song she chose. do they not ever learn that song choice is HUGE?
Scott - i thought he was awful.

my call for the bottom 3? Nadia, Scott and Anthony. Nadia goes home.
BRING BACK NIKKO!!! BRING BACK NIKKO!
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
You Heard It Here First!!
"The time has finally come to share our wonderful news that we are expecting our first child together. There were reports that I was in the hospital this weekend. Kevin and I just want everyone to know that all is well. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. Love Britney and Kevin,"

guess it wasn't just a publicity stunt...and now i've got me a new preggo buddy. ha!
My Spidey Senses are Tingling
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oy. now i understand why they wouldn't let him present an Oscar.
Maybe he's been learning how to eat from Jake Gylenhaal:
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and Gwen Stefani:
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and Hilary Swank:
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News From the Homefront
~~Well, my friend Gilda had a baby girl this morning - a week late - and without ANY medication - crazy girl!! I'm very excited! And I was right about the sex...and i'm NEVER right! yay!

~~The boy has woken up dry every morning for the last 5 mornings. i'm debating whether or not to try him in underwear at night. it's funny because with the girl she wore pullups to bed for ONE night and then it was underwear from then on. but, with him i'm hesitant.

~~I DID NOT watch the bachelor last night. i resisted and i'm so happy i did it. instead i did one of my new awesome pregnancy exercise videos. Go Me!!

~~My kids have been watching Toy Story 2 over and over again since Sunday. I should be happy - i don't have to watch spy kids 3, Ella Enchanted or New York Minute anymore...but there's only so much I can take....

~~my big 'ole belly. in case you care to see.

~~we picked up my car from the shop yesterday. of course, he couldn't find anything wrong with it. of course. we are still replacing it asap. and as we were driving out of the place....my rearview mirror just popped off. so, instead of getting it fixed, the husband is making me drive around - WITHOUT A REARVIEW MIRROR. insanity.
Monday, April 11, 2005
Monday Gossiping...
~~ apparently "C" is for "Celery" over on Sesame Street these days

~~ and in rather unsuprising news, Chris from the Apprentice was arrested for disorderly conduct.

~~ anyone else think she's one of the nastiest things to come out of Hollywood??
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A Special Shout-out this Morning..
to my good friend Amber, who sent me THREE boxes of girl scout cookies!!!
Amber, you really are the BEST!!!
i get it....Susan's mother was drinking while pregnant...explains everything!
Oh My Goodness!
This episode was AMAZING!

~ooh...John comes back. yay. and i'm looking forward to a "Who's Your Daddy?" storyline.
~Okay, is Gabrielle just plain DUMB for telling Carlos that she knew about the offshore account???
~How much do i loathe Lynette. Okay, i don't hit my kids either. but, she was nothing but obnoxious this week. She dumped her hellions on Bree. Good for her for putting the fear of...well...Bree into them. Someone needed to put those kids in their place just once.
~Susan's storyline bores me to tears, yet again. and what on god's green earth was she wearing in the kitchen? was it a sweater? whatever it was...it needs to be burned.
~Ha! When Mike said that Susan's mother explained so much...i was thinking the exact same thing!
~So, Zach is Dana. Hmm...(Zach is Dana. Dana is Zach. Dana is a MAN.....anyone know the movie reference???)
~I love Bree. She OWNED the best line of the night. "He was right. I'll be waiting in the car."
~Did anyone else laugh in hysterics when Bree was staring at the picture of Andrew at the end?? no? it was just me? well, it certainly was FUNNY!
Friday, April 08, 2005
"You're a Newpsie!" "No, you're a Newpsie."
oh, OC. You never disappoint.

I'm actually NOT hating the idea of Marissa and Ryan getting back together. is that bad of me? and last night was the first night she didn't bug (well, except for her clothing choices...)

I love love loved when Ryan pushed Seth into the locker. i actually laughed out loud! They are the best couple on the show, by far. "If you're going to be my wingman, you have to catch the keys". Pippins McGee?

What? No one dancing in their underwear and sunglasses??? well...at least Ryan was topless, which is how, i think, he should stay for the remainder of the season.

"Who's Curt Schilling?" who the heck is Curt Schilling?
You know who would make a great Bachelor??
this guy right here. i would enjoy this much more than seeing Charlie O'Connell, the tool of the century.
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Don't know who this is?
why, it's Buffalo Bill, from The Silence of the Lambs.
Come on, work with me here. Picture him. on a group date.

"It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."
"What are you? About a size 12?"
"I love your hair, baby. Can i have it?
"Sweetie, you don't mind if i put on my xray goggles, do you?"

oh, it would be great.
Dead Car Driving...
i think this may be the end for the ole' girl.

she just has no more energy left.
yesterday, i was driving home and she started moving and shaking and then went from 80 to 60 to 40 to 20 and then just shut down. right in the middle of Yonge Street. I panicked a little. but i didn't cry. i KIT. kept. it. together. for the most part.

finally, i turned it on and was able to make it home. but, she's a goner. i was in denial for so long...but it may be time to put the lady to rest.

it's a sad, sad day.
"You hang out with losers, you become a loser"
~~I love Tana. I think she was a great project manager and i am hoping she wins this whole thing. she's goofy, she's awkward, and she NEVER fails to crack me up. my personal favorite of the night?

Tana: "So, what do you like in your bottom?"
kid: "You mean, like, my pants?"
Tana: "Oh, yes, your pants"

~~Could there be any worse of an invention than the "Laptop Hoodie"? yeah, that would sell... that's how i like to carry around my laptop...in my freakin' neck!

~~Bren still brings too much creep for me. ew. and I'm still liking Craig. And i love love loved the two of them taking on the guys in Brooklyn.

~~When they lost, i couldn't figure out who screwed up the worst: Angie and her HORRIBLE presentation, Alex and his bone-headed ideas (see Laptop Hoodie above) and his total lack of control, or Chris and his lost credit card. "I hope they find that credit card so I don't have to find an aluminum bat and break somebody's kneecaps." giggle.
"The tribe has definitely not spoken."
~~Holy cow - Jeff Probst is LOVING this. "Immunity is up for grabs, that means A N Y O N E can win immunity" was classic. and sending Stephenie back to camp all alone! the poor thing. i think i'd rather go home than have to be all alone. That being said, Stephenie rocks the Survivor world. I love her. and i love that she has no clue that Tom and Ian are planning to save her ass.

~~Okay, even though Bobby Jon was dumb as nails, he still brought the pretty and i liked him. Yeah, i liked him, until he started blowing snot rockets. ew.

~~and i'm sorry. I like being clean as much as the next guy, but 55 gallons of water was not worth having to eat the poor baby chickens. ew. when Tom said to watch out for the beak? i swear i almost lost my dinner. i'll take my baths in the ocean, thank you very much. and yes, i'll boil my water if i have to. no biggie. that was THE WORST REWARD.

~~I'm officially on the Coby love train. I'm lovin' that he's getting grouchy and snarky. and i'm lovin' that he's kickin arse in this game. i hope he continues to stir up trouble. he's single-handedly making the most boring tribe in history slightly entertaining.

~~Janu and Caryn are a big snoozefest. they can leave asap.
Thursday, April 07, 2005
The Random Ten
1. Ready to Run - Dixie Chicks
2. World on Fire - Sarah McLachlan
3. Oklahoma! - Oklahoma soundtrack
4. Eveything You Want - Vertical Horizon
5. Sympathy for the Devil - Rolling Stones
6. Baby, I Love Your Way - Peter Frampton
7. Fever Dog - from Almost Famous
8. Hard to Say I'm Sorry - Chicago
9. Mr. Jones (acoustic) - Counting Crows
10. Last Kiss - Pearl Jam
Preggo Update - Week 23
So, I'm finally starting to get over the daily nausea thing. it's about freakin' time.

but, now i'm entering the fun world of not being able to get comfortable in bed. it's AWFUL. i get into one position and then half my body falls asleep, so i turn over, and then that lasts only about 4 minutes. ah...the pleasures of pregnancy. i can hardly wait until it gets super hot out and i'm boiling to death at night. yay!

i'd love to get me one of these. ha!! not really...i would totally abuse it.

i got a bella band (thanks Mia and Devora...you guys are the best!) and i couldn't be more excited!! it means i'll be able to wear my prepregnancy clothes for a little while longer....take that Mom!! i won't have to wear muumuus just yet!

oh, and also, i totally can't breathe anymore.
Daily Dish...
~~Rumors are a-buzz that Michael Douglas not only had a facelift recently, but that he also had a tummy tuck. i ask you, if he were going to go to all the trouble to have his face and his tummy done, couldn't the man have gone all out and gotten breast reduction as well....his man-boobs are bigger than mine (well, my pre-pregnancy ones)
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~~It's a girl for Elisabeth Hasselbeck and her hubby, NFL quarterback Tim Hasselbeck. The yet-to-be-named babe was born on her daddy's birthday. aw. what a nice birthday gift :)

~~definition of a loser: someone who waits in line in April for a May 19th movie release. definition of a bigger loser: these poor people.
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Nikko was robbed....again.
i'm starting to get angry with this show. it began way back in last season when LaToya London was voted off way before her time. and now Nikko was voted off, not once, but twice. what the hell? is there something wrong with the American Idol voters?? Please...come one...Scott Savol? Constantine? Anthony Federov? Nikko could wipe the floor with these three. they are so BAD.

i'm guessing that the morons out there who are voting for Anthony and Scott are doing it because there two are sob stories.

Nikko? honey? if you put out an album...i'll buy it. you rock.
Paula! Sit down and stop humping the singers legs please!
the goods:
Carrie - yes, she picked a boring-ass song. but she sang it well. Randy was right on the money with that one.
Vonzelle - she was so good. she does a much better Babs than Mikalah did.
Nikko - i'm totally 100% on the Nikko love train. and he sang West Side Story. aw.
Anwar - he was good. finally.
Nadia - she was good tonight. she'll probably still end up in the bottom 3, though

the mehs:
Bo - eh.

the bads:
Scott - oh man. so bad.
Anthony - Dude, here'a tip. Men should never sing anything from The Sound of Music. EVER.
Constantine - am i allowed to say that Matt-freakin-Damon sang this better in Talented Mr. Ripley? and girls? just for the record....he's NOT good looking.
"Goin' Out in Style!!"
~~I'm so bummed to see the brothers go. i loved them.

~~racers! are you listening? First rule of Amazing Race - Read. The. Clue. Second rule of Amazing Race - Read. The Clue. Again. Uchenna and Joyce got lucky, but unfortunately the brothers did not.

~~I smiled when the boyfriends started putting on layers of clothing. hysterical. “Will you put on underwear like it’s a headband?” but also quite brilliant. and “How many gay guys does it take to milk a goat?” classic.

~~ah, Phil love. “The Fashion police is going to arrest you here in Africa.”

~~Ron and Kelly are sooo annoying. they have to leave this show. soon. Ron's a dick ("ballet girl!") and Kelly's a bitch (“You’re a piece of trash redneck.”)
You know you are really pregnant when...
you start crying in the car on the way to work, listening to a stinkin' Tim McGraw song.
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
News From Hollywoodland...
~~Mary-Kate still looks homeless.
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i hope this isn't because they are selling their apartment!

~~18-year-old party-girl Lindsay Lohan seems to be dating 38-year-old washed-up badboy Christian Slater. anyone surprised at this news???

~~I have seen enough to know i have seen too much...of Katrina from the Apprentice. yuck.

~~Pretty in Pink is getting a sequel. The sequel, which is planned for a 2006 release, will show fans what has changed for the characters now that their high school days are over. The movie's original stars - Molly Ringwald, Andrew McCarthy and John Cryer - have all agreed to appear.
Here's hoping it doesn't suck!
argh. i could kill my mother today.
she asks how i'm feeling.

"Feeling okay. kind of frustrated that i don't really look pregnant. just fat."
silence.
"You looked pregnant the last time i saw you."
"Yeah, that was a month ago, and i really didn't look pregnant then either, just chubby. and i look about the same. Maternity clothes look silly. and my regular clothes look tight."
"You should be wearing maternity."
"But it drowns me. it looks like i'm wearing someone else's clothes."
"But you are pregnant. it doesn't matter."
"It doesn't matter how i look? i should just wear them, even though they don't fit?"
"I'm sure they fit."
"I'm telling you that they don't"
"But you are pregnant."
"Okay, mom, i'm not going to argue with you. and i'm not complaining. i'm just saying. i'm wearing the same three things over and over."
"So, fine. wear them."

yeah. that's my mom. in a nutshell.
I did it! I did it! I did it! Hooray!
(yes, that should be sung to the Dora song...)

I finally freed myself from that nasty show....The Bachelor. I slept through it last night...woke up to watch the catty rose ceremony...and decided i'm totally 100% OVER this show. thank the lord.
ABC Meme
lifted from Stacy:

Accent: Chicago (mixed with some Canadian)
Bra Size: usually 32B, right now 34D! yikes!
Chore I hate: putting away anything - clean clothes from the laundry, dried dishes out of the drainer, dishes out of the dishwasher.
Dad’s name: Steve
Essential make-up: MAC concealer (for under my eyes to get rid of the black) and lip gloss
Favorite perfume: Vera Wang
Gold or Silver: Silver or white gold
Hometown: Milwaukee
Interesting fact: i can touch my nose with my tongue
Job title: Editor
Kids: Emily and Joshua, plus the little bunny on the way
Living arrangements: we own our own house (and when i saw "own", i mean we pay lots and lots of money to the bank for it)
Mom’s birthplace: Austria
Number of apples eaten in last week: None
Overnight hospital stays: 3 (one with each of the kids and one when i fell while i was pregnant)
Phobia: Vomiting
Question you ask yourself a lot: "Do i look fat?"
Religious affiliation: Jewish
Siblings: 3 - one sister and two brothers
Time I wake up: anywhere between 6:15 and 7:15
Unnatural hair color: light brown with blond highlights
Vegetable I refuse to eat: i pretty much eat them all
Worst habit: picking at my head
X-rays: elbow, toe
Yummy food I make: i make lots and lots of good stuff....:)
Zodiac sign: Gemini
Does Anyone Else Think...
that Britney's whole "is she or isn't she" pregnancy is just a big 'ole publicity stunt??

think about it. she's got the entire world wondering whether or not she's pregnant. you couldn't pay for better exposure.
Monday, April 04, 2005
Monday Gossip Galore...
~~Holy Hell! What happened to Michael Douglas??
Image hosted by Photobucket.comImage hosted by Photobucket.com

~~Apparently, picking movie roles isn't the only thing that Ben Affleck falls a little short on.

Michael Clark Duncan was quoted saying, "Don't get me wrong, ladies, Ben is cool, but I've seen the guy naked in Armageddon and c'mon, man! I was not impressed at all, man! I was like, 'This is it, huh? This is it right here?'" ha!

~~Even though "American Idol" finalist Scott Savol was once arrested after a confrontation with his son's mother, he won't be kicked off the show. Apparently, Corey Clark's battery charge and Frenchie Davis' porn past were too much for the producers...but Scott is A-OK by them.

~~check out a young Zach Braff on an episode of the Babysitter's Club.
Desperate Housewiving
~~I love Bree. I loved when she took charge at the funeral. classic Bree. she's so awesome. and way to go Rex for growing himself a pair of balls and standing up for Bree and slamming Andrew up against that wall. his punk ass truly deserved it.

~~killing off Mama Solis was a serious cop-out (although i did enjoy rewinding the fall and watching it about 6 times). methinks this won't be the last we hear about Gabrielle's infidelity.

~~I like the Edie/Susan spats. great line by Edie: "before you start whining that dating Susan is punishment enough..." Susan seriously needs to open that letter. She's starting to annoy.

~~for a while, i thought Gabrielle was beginning to grow a heart - staying with Carlos, breaking it off with John - but i was wrong. she's heartless. her behavior at the funeral was downright childish.

~~I actually liked Lynette this week. and this was the first i've liked of Julie: "I’m going to mourn now."
And a Happy Daylight Savings Time to You and Yours
Well, i knew there was a good reason why i didn't take the 25 seconds that it takes to fix my watch way back in the fall.... my watch was already adjusted to daylight savings time when i woke up on sunday morning (at 8:45!! ah! my kids slept in! my kids slept in! it was truly a miracle!)

my weekend was nice - except for the two-day long blizzard we had on saturday and sunday. i mean, seriously, it's April. April showers??? anyone? anyone? it's not supposed to be April snowstorms!!

we had some friends over to kick off the summer BBQ season...although summer was truly the farthest thing from our minds...having people over for a barbeque turns into a full day long affair. the husband can't just do the burger and dog thing. oh no. he's learned from his good friend Bobby** that a bbq isn't a bbq unless you get crafty and do things like make your own ketchup (yes, homemade ketchup) and onion marmelade. needless to say, it was delicious, but it was still an insane day spent preparing.

oh, and the boy is still toilet trained. we are sooo proud of him. and he woke up dry as a bone this morning. yay.

**Bobby Flay :)
Friday, April 01, 2005
from the files...
~~from the bad hair day files:
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~~from the bad Purim costume files:
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~~from the Jane Fonda bad hygiene files:
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~~from the bad beer belly files:
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(and yes, that IS Colin Farrell)
Why Is it...
that people take such delight in the misfortune of others???

the husband and i were talking about how so many parents get cheap thrills out of highlighting all the amazing things that their children do, and pointing out all the things that other children DON'T do.

our friends were recently somewhere and two sets of parents were watching their son and had no trouble pointing out that their son was a "slow talker". whatever. give the kid a break. so, he's not speaking tons yet. who the heck cares?

both my kids were early talkers. does that mean anything? nothing. nothing at all. does that mean that my kids are better than the late talkers? or perhaps smarter in some way? no. both my kids crawled late. so, does that mean that they are physically more weak than the kids who crawled early??

here's a fact. every child develops differently. some are early to do things. some are late. it's as simple as that. the majority of the kids all catch up at some point.

here's a tip. let your kids enjoy life. and let their parents enjoy watching their children enjoy life. stop pointing out deficiencies in others. it's bad for your complexion.
There are Meatballs Everywhere...
~~Okay, for the record, i'm not a huge Chris fan. i think he's a lunatic and scary, and i think he's a ticking time bomb, but he DID NOT threaten Alex. Dude.

~~What was Stephanie thinking??? she deserved to be fired simply because she decided that going to Brooklyn to deliver pizzas was a GOOD idea. Moron. and how awesome was Carolyn's "look" when she heard that?

~~Apprentice mangled English strikes again...and twice in one episode. First Tana says, "This isn’t rocket scientist!" and then Stephanie says, "They were argumentive with each other." At least Tana's made me laugh.

~~i'm liking Tana and Kendra ("Trump must have been a rapper in a past life. I've never seen so much gold in my life!").

~~smirky Bren gives me the creep-ola-s.
Ian's gonna need a humpback whale now...
this episode was only "eh" for me. there's only so much slaughtering of Ulong that i can take. it's no longer fun to watch Koror win challenges and watch Ulong lose them.

i love how Gregg and Jenn's survivor relationship would probably be the same off the island..."You don't pay attention enough to me...you are standoffish...." yada yada...

and poor Bobby Jon. Not only does he get super flustered at the big giant puzzle, but his little black fish gets completely overshadowed by Tom's great white shark catch. poor guy. can't he get a break?

Janu seriously looked like she was going to DIE during the immunity challenge.

at this point, it doesn't make any sense to merge. with 8 against 2, Ulong would just send Bobby Jon and Stephenie home in the first two tribal councils. so, either way, their days are numbered. it was so dumb not to merge the two tribes earlier. but, when ulong loses again next week (and they will lose. oh yes, they will) how are they going to do a vote with two people?

BTW - remember when Survivor was great and there was no food at all? it was so much more fun to watch players waste away then to see them gorging themselves on all their over-abundance of food. case in point? Katie hasn't shed a single pound.


I'm a displaced American writer, mom, and wife living in Canada who muses about my life, my kids, my tv watching and my slight obsession with celebrities.
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Reading Lolita in Tehran * Azar Nafisi
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close * Jonathan Safran Foer
i bet you look good on the dance floor * arctic monkeys
the skin of my yellow country teeth * clap your hands say yeah
chasing cars * snow patrol
movie script ending * death cab for cutie
anthems for a 17-year-old girl * broken social scene
all these things that I've done * the killers
one more night (your ex-lover remains dead) * stars
a little less 16 candles a little more touch me * fall out boy
the great salt lake * band of horses
october, first account * be your own pet
mushaboom * feist
letter from an occupant * new pornographers


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