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Tuesday, November 30, 2004
On Saturday night, my husband took me out for a surprise date. Knowing how little I like surprises (and being out of control), he took great pleasure in NOT telling me where we were going.

He said it was voted the 6th most romantic places in Toronto. Now...I'm wondering why I wasn't even good enough for top five...just joking. I'm completely pleasantly surprised that he's taking me out. it's so rare that we go out, just the two of us. it's actually so rare that we even see each other these days. With our hectic schedules - between sports, meetings, and him being in Washington, we seem to be spending more time apart than time together.

So, he took me to this place called the Lula Lounge. and it was awesome. At 9:00, they have a salsa dancing teacher come out onto the dance floor and give an hour-long salsa dancing class, which, by the way, was great! It was so much fun to try to learn all the moves and laugh at the clumsiness of people around us. I think by the end we were actually dancing...probably. Then at 10, they brought out a live Cuban band. The only negative thing was that it was very very loud, and really hard to hear each other.

oh, and then there was the matter of the thong that he slipped into my purse and forced me to go into the bathroom to change. Yes, exactly what I wanted to do, get undressed in a Cuban bar. But, since I'm so obliging - I did it. I hope he appreciated it, because I certainly appreciated my night out.

okay...granted i have long hair...and yes, i am short.
but, i do NOT look like this.

This random woman comes up to me last night, with her mother, and goes absolutely nutty on me ranting on and on, "Has anyone ever told you that you look exactly like Stacy from the Apprentice?" After politely saying, "um, no." she went on to say, "my mother and I think you look IDENTICAL to her. Really. you look exactly like her. It's meant to be a compliment."

sheesh. egads.

then, thankfully, another woman came over to me, and made me feel a little bit better about myself by saying, "You look nothing like Stacy. You are much prettier. She's very pointy and annoying. Really, you totally don't look like her."

Thank you, and yes, you can stroke my ego anytime.
Gym Spotting...
spotted at the gym yesterday...

~James Cameron
~Kevin Federline
~Danny Glover
~Simon Cowell
~2 boys from b4-4....although now that i think about it, it may actually have been two of the boys from b4-4....we share a dry cleaner...why couldn't we share a gym???

all in all...not the best looking day at the gym. i'm always on the lookout for Simon Rex. i've only seen him there twice. but, man oh man, he's hot.
Mayday! Mayday!
We have puke-age, people. Major puke-age.
Thank heavens for the husband, who was incredible last night. He knows about my vomit issues, and didn't think twice. He cleaned the bathroom (since she missed the toilet), he gave her a bath, and he slept in the family room with her all night.

She seems to be okay this morning....espcially since at 8:15 she wandered into my room to ask me for a donut. It might have just been a one time deal. i'm still trumatized nonetheless, and exhausted. and forever in debt to my hubby, who truly saved the day. and who stayed home to be with her today.

keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best!
Monday, November 29, 2004
The Bane of My Existence
I've been using this phrase for a really long time. I didn't - until today - know what this phrase actually means.

To say that something or someone is "the bane of my existence" means that the person or thing is a constant irritant or source of misery. As a cliché, "bane of my existence" has lost its edge to a large degree over the years, and today is most often applied to something that may profoundly annoy us but is certainly bearable. Telemarketers, for instance, have become the "bane" of many folks' existence, but few of us are sufficiently distressed to turn off our telephones, and while "spam" is a daily "bane," not many of us would dream of giving up the Internet. "Bane of my existence" is now almost always used in a semi-jocular, "what are you gonna do?" sense.

But "bane" was once a very serious word. The Old English "bana" meant literally "slayer" in the sense we now use "killer" or "murderer." Early on, the English "bane" was also used in the more general sense of "cause of death," and by the 14th century "bane" was used in the specialized sense of "poison," a sense which lives on in the names of various poisonous plants such as "henbane" and "wolfbane."

From this very literal "something that kills you" usage, "bane" by the 16th century had broadened into its modern meaning of "something that makes life unpleasant, a curse."

The funny thing is that i've been using it correctly! Go me!
Feelin' Groovy
So, Mrs. Huber dies, and Susan gets laid. it's about time. for both of them.

I hope they begin to give Gabrielle some heart. She started out as my favorite housewife...but i'm slowly (well, not so slowly) being turned off by her. I really liked her unhappily married-sleeping with the gardener storyline. But, there's no goodness in her. They need to make us root for her, not for the grieving Carlos.

I heart Lynette. and Felicity Huffman plays her perfectly. And alas...she actually does have 4 kids! i don't think all 4 of them have been in the same episode since the first one. I loved her in the park - she was great. and it really showed that these women ARE actually friends. But, honestly, if you were going for acupuncture, would you shlep along your 4 kids and expect them to sit quietly -by themselves - in a waiting room....methinks not.

Oh, Bree, you poor thing. Your children are monsters. and someone needs to beat the shit out of Andrew.

Did anyone else catch the blender that Mrs. Huber takes out and then gest whacked with? all comes full circle....
It's a boy! and it's a girl!
Julia Roberts has given birth to her twins. Even though she wasn't due until January, the bed-ridden Roberts had Hazel Patricia and Phinnaeus Walter early on Sunday in Los Angeles.

Following typical Hollywood naming footsteps (ala Apple and Coco), Roberts and her husband, Danny Moder, steered clear of allowing their offspring any sense of normalcy in their lives.
Friday, November 26, 2004
Q1: Yesterday was Thanksgiving. Would you say you over did it or kept it in check when it came to stuffing yourself with food?

definitely did NOT overdo it. yesterday afternoon my hubby sent me this article so i decided that i wasn't going to gorge myself. I said, going in, that i was going to have turkey (no gravy), sweet potato pie, and salad, and have pumpkin pie for dessert. and that's exactly what i had - and i didn't even finish the pumpkin pie. i enjoyed myself, ate the foods i wanted to eat, and didn't feel like a heifer afterwards.

Q2: Earlier this week, Columbia Tri-Star Pictures released the first three seasons of Seinfeld on DVD. Have you ever purchased a season's worth of a particular television show on DVD for yourself? If not, which television show would you most likely buy if it were released on DVD?

i have never bought any tv shows on dvd, although i'd buy a ton of them if i could. and i know that my stepmom got me the My So Called Life DVD on ebay :). i would love to own the Sopranos. or Entourage. or Once and Again - season 3. if they came out with Beverly Hills 90210, i would definitely buy that!

Q3: If you could wake up tomorrow morning speaking any one language fluently--in addition to English--which language would you choose and why?

ooh..i've love to be able to speak Italian. what a gorgeous language.

Q4: Do you feel there are any circumstances under which it's okay for a professional athlete to enter the stands, other than to celebrate a victory with loved ones or fans?

not a chance. professional sports are spectator sports. fans have ZERO business on the field, ice, court etc.
oooh...someone's going to die this week...
...on Desperate Housewives.... but honestly, this reeks of that time on Beverly Hills, 90210 when "one of the main characters" was going to die. I remember sitting on the school bus discussing who we thought was going to be killed. and after all that discussion, it was Scott Scanlan...a measley sidekick of a B-rated cast member. BAH!

So, what the odds, people? Who's kicking the bucket?

Edie - ID: The divorced hussy housewife.

Primary suspect: Mr. Shaw, a hit man who has been hired by Paul Young to kill his dead wife's blackmailer, revealed last week to be Edie.

Odds she's a goner: 2:1

As of last week, Edie's atop the hit list. Also, Sheridan wasn't signed on as a series regular, and what a great way for ABC to end that NFL Towelgate controversy.

Mama Solis - ID: The snoopy housewife mother-in-law.

Primary suspects: Gabrielle and John, who'd rather have Juanita die in her hospital bed before she reveals all to Carlos.

Odds she's a goner: 1:1. Great actress and fun character, but expendable.

Gabrielle - ID: The philandering housewife

Primary suspect: Her husband, Carlos, whose mother, Juanita, lies in critical condition after being hit by a car soon after spying Gabrielle in bed with the gardener, John. Will Juanita spill the beans to Carlos? Gabrielle had better hope not.

Odds she's a goner: 8:1. A huge loss to the show and fashion magazines everywhere.

Lynette - ID: The junkie housewife, addicted for two weeks to ADD medication.

Primary suspect: Any of the other desperate mothers on the playground Lynette has been hitting up for their kiddies' meds.

Odds she's a goner: 35:1. It took Dallas drunk Sue Ellen Ewing six seasons before she hit rock bottom. Lynette's descent has only just begun.

Susan - ID: The clumsy housewife.

Primary suspect: Paul Young, should he learn that Susan and her daughter, Julie, sneaked into his son Zach's institution snooping for info on Mary Alice Young's suicide.

Odds she's a goner: 50:1. Killing the star of TV's No. 1 new drama would be sheer suicide.

Mrs. Huber - ID: The blackmailing housewife. Often compared to Mrs. Kravitz on Bewitched.

Primary suspects: Susan, who was blackmailed into buying groceries for Mrs. Huber after she discovered Susan had accidentally burned down Edie's house. Or Bree, whose perfect lawn Mrs. Huber destroyed.

Odds she's a goner: 3:1

It's unlikely Susan is desperate enough to kill Mrs. Huber, but if Mrs. Huber was capable of blackmailing Susan, who else in the neighborhood might she have blackmailed?

Bree - ID: The obsessive-compulsive housewife.

Primary suspects: Her husband, Rex, and teenage kids Danielle and Andrew, who all can't stand Bree, especially after she kicked the kids out of the house last week. With Andrew having plowed down Juanita with his car, the family could kill Bree, pin the hit-and-run on her and have the spotless house to themselves.

Odds she's a goner: 25:1. Housewives without Bree is like ... well, Melrose Place without Heather Locklear. Pointless.

My money is on Mrs. Huber. She's boring and brings nothing to the story. Or possibly Mama Solis, although this would make things way too easy for Gabrielle. I think they want you to think that it's Edie, but there's no way they are giving up Nicolette Sheridan so quickly. definitely not when she's just starting to get interesting.

(special thanks to USA today)
Thursday, November 25, 2004
Surprise, Surprise....
Jonathan (of TAR6 fame) is a complete jackass.

He told the Providence Journal, "The editing wasn't kind to me, was it? They used everything bad that was there. Victoria and I are like any married couple, we fight sometimes, but not like that. ... We do love each other. But the way we're represented, I'm abusing her."

He went on to say:

"I did this to myself. I went in wearing crazy colors. I didn't want to play the nice guy. I wanted to be colorful and over-the-top. I didn't want to be just nice. It wouldn't be fun. It wouldn't get any attention. ... if you just be real, it will be boring. If you take it to a heightened level, it will be interesting," he says.

yes, it sure is fun to abuse your wife. yelling, screaming, closing car doors on her, hitting her, making her certainly got the attention you wanted, Bucko!
Happy Turkey Day!
There are few holidays that i enjoy more than Thanksgiving. Every year, my family gets together with family and friends to eat a huge meal and watch football. It's a really nice family tradition, one that i truly miss living in Canada.

The funny thing, though, is that the charming little story that we all learned in elementary know the one...the Pilgrims sat down with Indians for a big meal of turkey, cornbread, cranberries and pumpkin pie. The Pilgrims dressed in black (with big buckles), and the Indians wore feathers and colorful all a MYTH!!

Myth #1. the meal.
The truth is that in the fall of 1621, the colonists did have a festive meal - for four days - with the Wampanoag Indians. it wasn't until 1777 that the Continental Congress declared the first national Thanksgiving. And it wasn't until 1963 that President Lincoln established Thanksgiving as a national holiday.

Myth #2. the food.
The traditional foods that we eat on Thanksgiving - stuffing, turkey, pumpkin pie....these were NOT the foods that were eaten at the first Thanksgiving meal. Most of the actual accounts list corn aplenty and deer, not turkey, as the meat. There were no forks, only knives, spoons, and large napkins that were used to pick up hot foods and to tidy the face and fingers. Food could be eaten directly from the serving dish or you could share a trencher (wooden plate).

Myth #3. the get-up
When i think Pilgrim, i think pointed hat, buckled shoes, black and white. In fact, the Pilgrims did not only wear black - they wore white, beige, black, green and brown. And it's certainly likely that the Indians were fully clothed...not dressed in loincloths. i mean, after all, it was November in Massachusetts!

Either way, it's a holiday i love...and this year, while my family is all in Nashville, celebrating together, i will be with my Canadian family, celebrating a tradition that a few of us have started.

All of our American friends living in Canada (and their significant others of course) will be getting together tonight to have a turkey, stuffing, cranberry, sweet potato, pumpkin, potluck dinner. and i, for one, am quite excited :)

A cosmetics billboard advertisement of Sarah Jessica Parker, of the cable television show 'Sex in the City,' in Tel Aviv, Israel, Tuesday Nov. 23, 2004, ran afoul of religious groups. The top billboard shows Parker wearing a more revealing dress, while the bottom shows workers changing the billboard to more modest attire after members of the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community threatened to boycott the company's products. (AP Photo/Yossi Aloni)
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
What's going on in Texas??
The police in Plano, Texas arrested a woman accused of allegedly cutting the arms off her 11-month-old baby girl and have charged her with capital murder.

But, it seems, according to the associated press, that Dena Schlosser joins a number of Texas women who have killed their children in a gruesome way.

The state has had at least four similar cases in recent years. Andrea Yates drowned her five children in the family's Houston bathtub in 2001. Deanna Laney bashed her three sons' skulls with rocks last year, killing two and maiming a toddler. She said God told her to do it.

A mother from suburban Dallas drowned her daughters last fall, and a woman in Brownsville is accused of helping her common-law husband behead her three children.

In all the cases, the women had some sort of mental illness in their past.
love him...
"I directed my first episode [of Scrubs]. Fortunately for me, there was a scene involving my character making out with Heather Graham. I ordered many, many retakes."
--Writer-director-actor Zach Braff in People, indirectly explaining why everybody always wants to direct.
Tuesday, November 23, 2004 think you know everything??
A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of
the $5 bill.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to
6 years of age.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters

If the population of China walked past you, in single file, the line would never
end because of the rate of reproduction.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and
"lollipop" with your right.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a
chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every
letter of the alphabet.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous":
tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order:
"abstemious" and "facetious."

Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Thanks for that, Sheresa. Now i know everything!!! I edited it down a little bit, though :)
Drowning in the sea of sick
it's Murphy's Law, naturally. my husband goes out of town, and that's exactly when my children decide that they are going to go bezerk.

on sunday night i put Josh to sleep and i heard this really strange cry out of him - it wasn't his normal "i don't want to miss the party" kind of cry, it was more "get in here, mommy" so i went in and right when i got there.....warning...not for the faint of stomach...

he puked - but it was like a geyser coming out of his mouth and then it splashed down into his eyes and ears and hair - it was everywhere. ew. he was 100% fine afterwards and even said, as i was attempting to clean him up " me puke in me bed" Yes, Josh Josh, you certainly did.

he's completely fine, by the way. i mean, my nanny gave him macaroni and cheese for lunch and hot chocolate in the afternoon (what was she thinking???) and he ate a hot dog for dinner. totally not sick. i think he just drank his sippy cup too quickly.

so, last night, at 12:30, shortly after i'd gone to sleep, he woke up, asking for milk. i didn't want to give it to him for fear of a repeat puke performance, so i thought, okay, i'll just bring him into my bed for a little while. but, i couldn't. sometime between 11:50 (when i went to sleep) and 12:30 (when Josh woke up) Emily had managed to relocate into my bed. i didn't want Josh to wake her so i took him downstairs.

he, of course, was wide awake. and stayed awake through 6 episodes of Dora (i have them tivo'ed) until 3:30 when i'd had it and realized that i really needed to go to sleep.

oh my sooo exhausted today. was planning to go to the gym. can barely stand up on my feet. i was skip today.
Monday, November 22, 2004
IQ and politics...
not sure if this is true....but it's funny anyway.
Sunday, November 21, 2004
Pacers-Pistons Game Gets Ugly
USA Today has a frame-by-frame look at the brawl that erupted on Friday night between Ron Artest and some Detroit fans in the stands.

"It's the ugliest thing I've seen as a coach or player," said Pistons coach Larry Brown. "I am embarrassed for our league and disappointed to be part of this."

Long story short, here's what happened. Ben Wallace went for a shot, and Ron artest shoved him. Wallace shoved back. both benches emptied. After a fan threw a cup at Artest, he stormed the benches, then Stephen Jackson joined him and they began hitting fans. It took about 15 minutes before the players were removed from the stands.

It was the first time in 47 years that a Pistons basketball game was not allowed to finish.

So, at the end of all of this, according to, Ron Artest was suspended for the rest of the season. Nine players from the teams were banned for a combined 143 games, including some of the harshest penalties the league has ever issued. Artest is the first player to be suspended for nearly an entire season for a fight during a game.

Saturday, November 20, 2004
My brother is a father!!!
holy moly! i'm dying!

Lauren Alethea was born on friday, November 19th - on her due date!!
Friday, November 19, 2004
Four For Friday
Q1: 30,000 people gathered in Little Rock, Arkansas, for the opening of the $165,000,000 William J. Clinton Presidential Center and Park. Have you ever been to a presidential library? If not, which presidential library would you be most inclined to go out of your way to visit?

Q2: If you had your own radio show, what format would it be? Would you go it alone or have sidekicks? Would you just spin records, or would you host a talk show? If music, what kind would you play? If talk radio, what topics would you focus on?

Q3: Next Thursday is Thanksgiving, which has traditionally been the start of the holiday shopping season. How much of your 2004 holiday shopping have you already completed?

Q4: If you arrived in the same amount of time, would you rather take the short way slow or the long way fast?

Here are my answers:
Q1: As far as i know, i've never been to one. most likely the Kennedy Library... The Nixon one isn't really a library is it? does it count? cuz i'd like to go there too.
Q2: definitely have sidekicks...i'm not funny enough to do it alone. it wouldn't just be music and wouldn't just be talk - -- it would be a good miz of awesome music and lots of talk about pop culture and entertainment.
Q3: how much completed? well, my husband did buy the shrek 1&2 package dvd's for the kids for an early chanukah gift. but as far as other gifts...not even close yet...
Q4: definitely the long way fast. I hate traffic and i hate chaos and congestion - - - i would take the longer way as long as i'm moving.
so much little time...
i did manage to watch a ridiculous amount of tv last night. I'm not watching Survivor at all, but since my hubby is, he watched and i scrapbooked, so i managed to get a glimpse of what's going on on that show. and, honestly, last night's episode made me glad that i stopped watching after 3 episodes. Why, oh why are they all afraid of Ami?? They NEED to vote her off. Especially because she said that she fully expects to be in the final 2. Hello, dumbasses, that should be your first clue. She's got them all wrapped around her basoomas.

oh, and then there's the Apprentice. brilliant. absolutely brilliant. and kudos to my husband who somehow managed to know that Trump was going to fire them both. I'm still thinking that he read it somewhere. it's never been done before, how could he possibly think that would happen? but either way, it was GREAT. my favorite line of the night was when Wes said he wished he got his own cab! I'm not sorry to see Maria go. Her blinking was bothering the hell out of me. Jennifer is winning this game. You heard it here first. Now she's got Donald Trump thinking that she's amazing. but that was great with the "busy work" that they gave her because she didn't understand the concepts. ha! GREAT episode. loved it.

The OC. is it just me or is Lindsey just a nicer looking version of Andrea Zuckerman? Think about it. Smart girl with an attitude. Thinks everyone at school plays water polo??!! i do recall Andrea assigning Brandon to cover a girl's water polo match in the first episode. Lindsey dislikes Ryan because she thinks he is rich, where, in fact, he's not rich, he just runs with the rich. same as Brandon. oh, i love it! It's also kind of nice to see Ryan with someone other than Marissa, especially since now Marissa and KiKi Kirsten are stepsisters!! So, what does that make Seth....Marissa's nephew? Also, i'm not sure how i feel about Seth's new flock-of-seagulls-hair boss. She looks a little bit like a cartoon character to me.

oh...good tv last night...
Thursday, November 18, 2004
The Dangers of Preschool...
after i dropped Emily off this morning, i was trying to get out of the way so a kid could zoom past me and the top of my foot got caught underneath a fence.

Now i have these two scrapes on the top of my foot. they aren't really bleeding, but the skin was definitely cut.

do i need a tetanus shot??? holy hell...i really hope not. i hear they hurt like a bitch. do i need to see a doctor about this? it hurts more than a brazilian wax, for heaven's sake!!
Colin Firth vs. Hugh Grant

anyone? anyone?
This is toughie for me. A few years ago, it would have been Hugh Grant all the way for me. There's something about the gorgey British man, with a bit of an edge. But, he's starting to age. around the eyes. oh, those blue puppy dog eyes. And no matter how i look at it, i still can't get that mug shot out of my head....

And Colin Firth. He had me from the second i saw him in Circle of Friends. ooh. the accent. and there's something very expressive in his face.

hmm...i'm going to have to go with Colin Firth in the end. but i wouldn't say no to either of them...:)

Wednesday, November 17, 2004
like this is any sort of surprise...

I could have told you that years ago!
Okay...fine...I'll admit it...

Jared was too preoccupied with the text message from me to care about Scarlett Johansson kissing him....
Only finally getting the hellboy reference now...


Goonies Never Say Die!
oh! It's Rosalita from the Goonies...playing Mama Solis on Desperate Housewives! Could anything be better than this news?

An old favorite on a new favorite.
"No payment! no payment! no sign! no sign!" oh, how i love her! Rosalita saves the day with her marble bag!

a funny fyi - both Brandon on Beverly Hills, 90210 and Brand on the Goonies are named Brandon Walsh. ha!

and another (that every Goonie fan should know) - While swimming to the Spanish boat, the group encounters an octopus. The octopus is driven away when Data throws his radio into its mouth. The octopus is mentioned to the reporters in the scene on the beach in the finished film, even though the scene was cut. (from

ooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh, i'm lovin' it!
(yes, that's the mcdonald's commerical song...come know you were singing it in your head when you read the words...)

anyway, i'm totally LOVIN' the amazing race. it's great. there are sooooo many couples that are interesting to watch. yay. so many i will love (Kris and Jon), so many i will love to make fun of (Adam and Rebecca), and so many i will love to hate (Lori and Bolo)....and then there's Jonathan and Victoria. They get their own category. What the hell?!!! i didn't think we could get any worse than Colin and Christie....but...once again, the folks at TAR pulled through and brought us someone who makes Colin look NORMAL.

highlights from episode 1: diesel, again,...what morons, the Scotland comments, Lori and Bolo performing their wrestling tricks on the snow, Bolo calling Lori a dumbass redneck, Avi...or was it Joe..singing "New York Jews in Iceland", my implants are frozen..., icelandic boat driver telling Jonathan to "step aside"

But, my absolute most favorite part of the show was when Adam and Rebecca ask who is behind them and they realize it's the models and they say, "I like the models." Meanwhile, the models are in the middle of saying that "hellboy and his girlfriend are4 foot 2 and they are munchkins and are going to have trouble ice climbing." classic.

I'm so excited for this season!!! yay!
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Movie Quote Quiz...
Let's see how many you can get right....NO CHEATING!!

1. "I'm scared to close my eyes. I'm scared to open them."

2. "There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance."
"Which one am I?"
"You're the worst kind. You're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance."

3. "Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa to you?"

4. "So, uh, you married old Norm son-of-a-Gunderson?"

5. "Did he dazzle you with his extensive knowledge of mineral water? Or was it his in-depth analysis of, uh, uh, Marky Mark that finally reeled you in?"

6. "Surrender."
"You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept."

7. "I can't tell... if it's an "A sharp" or if it's a "B flat"!"
"Heh, if you hit the wrong note, we'll all "B flat!""

8. "I'm telling secrets to the one guy you don't tell secrets to."

9. "Fluff and fold, buddy. Soon as I make it really big, I'm going fluff and fold."

10. "Walter, just stand outside so Chief can translate my Iraqi ass map... okay?"

Monday, November 15, 2004
The Thrill of the Chase....
Now I know why I like Seth so much. He's so much like me....i guess minus the comic book thing. and i'm not really all that funny. and i don't think i'm that dorky. maybe he's really nothing like me...except that i can completely understand the thrill of the chase.

When Summer told him, "It seems you only want me when you can't have me. You like the chase, and that's all. And you know what? You can have it," I was like, that was me, in high school.

ooh...after watching the season premiere of the OC, i was a little disappointed in the show and nervous that it had already jumped the shark, but episode 2 really calmed my worries. it was good!!! But, is there something wrong with me that I think the sexiest male on the show is Tate Donovan (Jimmy)? Does that mean that I'm outgrowing teeny-bopper status??? I hope not!

mmmm...scraggly, scruffy Jimmy. Loving it.
Ladies and Gentlemen...can we say...guilty???!!
Jurors found Scott Peterson guilty of first-degree murder in the death of his pregnant wife and second-degree murder in the death of their unborn son.

I can't take credit for this, but the folks at "You Can't Make It Up" really have got something much does Scott Peterson look like Zack Morris (for those of you who didn't watch Saved By the Bell...that's Mark Paul Gosselaar..from NYPD Blue)???

it's uncanny...

Friday, November 12, 2004
One Last Little Bitty...
...before the weekend.

That's Turk's cell number on Scrubs.

The funny part is that it is an actual number. and people who dialed it (no, not me, i wouldn't have done that...) were greeted by actual members of the Scrubs cast.

Apparantly, if you call the number now, you can hear this message: "You've reached Dr. Christopher Duncan Turk. I couldn't get to the phone right now but you've reached Turk — and that's a great thing, I'll tell you that much."

Oh, Scrubs is sooooo good!

Four For Friday
Q1: If you were given the opportunity to perform in the circus, and you knew ahead of time that you would not fail, what would you do?

trapeeze...i think.

Q2: You've just been hired to a promotions position at a major breakfast cereal company. What would you put in a new cereal box as a gimmick?

a willy wonka golden ticket. That would be awesome to get.

Q3: Who is the most famous or well known person you've had a face-to-face encounter with?

David Robinson.

Q4: Can you comfortably eat alone in a restaurant with nothing to do at the table but eat, i.e., nothing to read, no earphones to hear music thru, no one to talk with, etc.? What about going to the movies alone?

I can comfortably go shopping alone. in fact, i enjoy it much much better than going with someone else. But, i cannot eat alone in a restuarant (even if i'm reading or listening to music!), or go to a movie alone!! Never!

anyone? anyone?
It's your turn!!
Ooh...I'm in the BEST mood today...
for two reasons:

a) one of my best friends is pregnant!
b) because i knew it!

I think I should become some sort of spy. I'd make a really good one! She was at our house and she is an avid diet coke drinker. She drank sprite instead of diet coke. I was shocked, but my first thought was, "hmmm...she's not drinking caffeine....or diet...she's pregnant." I told my hubby, and he gave me a strict order, "DO NOT ASK HER." So, i didn't. i laid low. but this morning she called to tell us.


Thursday, November 11, 2004
Scariest (and Hairiest) Man Ever!!
Check this out!

Here's his official web site!

**I'd like to thank Maxim magazine for making me lose my dinner last night...ew.
Donna Martin Graduates! Donna Martin graduates!
ah! It seems like only yesterday that the gang from West Beverly chanted these words so their pal Donna could graduate with her class...

Some other memorable moments:

~Scott shoots himself.
~Brenda's pregnancy scare.
~Dylan is "persona nongrada" at the Walshes.
~Donna loses her virginity after six years....and then David cheats on Donna.
~Dylan picks Kelly (over Brenda) in the pool. "It's you. It's always been you."
~Ray abuses Donna.
~Mr. Walsh goes to Washington. and kisses Kelly.
~The downfall of Kelly - she's burned, then joins a cult, then turns to cocaine, then has a miscarriage, then gets shot, the gets raped, then shoots the rapist. Holy crap.

There are a lot more, but I figured I'd limit it to my most favorite moments.

my goodness...i miss this show. i wish we got FX in Canada. We don't have any reruns...suckypants.
when's it coming out on DVD? anyone?
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
I Want to Be a Stepford Wife!!!
Maybe I'm just not feminist enough.
But, the idea of living in a fantastic house in the suburbs that is always clean doesn't sound too bad. Stepford wives are beautiful, fit, and good cooks. They don't have to work, their husbands don't have to work, yet they always seem to have more than enough money. And they have good sex - - - in the middle of the day. I'm sorry to say, but that doesn't sound too shabby to me.
Sign me up!!!

While i enjoyed the first two-thirds of the movie (most likely because I went in not expecting too much out of it), I found the ending rather blah. I found out this morning that the ending was re-written after the original ending failed with test audiences. I wonder how bad that original ending must have been...

and, Jon Lovitz, I'm sorry, but he's hysterical. It has become a toss up for me as to who's delivery is better: his or Bree's from Desperate Housewives.
"Why cant you bake like that?"
"Why cant you?"
"Because I have a penis..."

my goodness, this kid cracks me up. If you live in Canada, and you haven't seen this's an absolute must-see.

According to the website, "This is Daniel Cook" is a spontaneous, live-action, on-location original series that follows its host -- six-year-old Daniel Cook -- as he explores the world from his perspective. In each episode we watch as Daniel Cook explores, learns, and creates with everyone from chocolate makers to world champion figure skaters, from firefighters to award-winning writers.

What they don't tell you is that this kid is by far the most unintentionally hilarious boy. Daniel Cook milks a cow. a classic. Daniel Cook takes tap lessons. in girls' tap shoes. with bows on them. Daniel Cook tastes new foods. peed in my pants. Daniel cook paints a giraffe at the zoo. and gives him a big 'ole blue tongue. hahahaha!

This is Daniel Cook can be seen every sunday on Treehouse at 6:30 pm EST. Check it out. You won't be sorry.

I am beginning to hate this girl...

Okay, it's started to get on my nerves that Natalie Portman gets to work with the best's see, my Jude, not once, but twice (cold mountain and closer), Ewan and Hayden Christensen (star wars), Zach Braff (garden state), and Timothy Hutton (beautiful girls).

How did she get soooo lucky?
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
My TV week...
"Raj, you're fired."
Classic Raj. Moments after being fired by Donald Trump, he asked The Apprentice 2's secretary, Robin, for her phone number. And I guess it worked, because according to Raj, he went out with her this past Friday night!
Although the bow-tied smooth-talker was starting to grow on me, Trump didn't want him to stick around. And, ultimately, Raj thinks the Donald made the right decision. "I lost a real estate task to a wedding planner, and I'm in the real estate business. I think Trump fired me because, without even looking at the stinking pygmy bedroom I had to work with, the very idea of taking a four-bedroom house and making it a three-bedroom house was bad."


oh, Desperate Housewives, my oh-so guilty pleasure. I heart this show so much.
Bree, with her delivery on those lines. When she said, "To be honest, the only thing I don't like about sex is the scrotum. I mean obviously it has its practical applications but I'm just not a fan," at the restaurant, I almost peed my pants. Oh, and Lynette, where oh where have your other two kids gone? But, i love you - I love that you found good use for the medication you didn't want to give to your boys! gotta love the drugs. And Gabrielle, you sneaky one...too bad Mama Solis is onto you - she knows about your boy toy - this is NOT going to be pretty. but, it's too quick. Carlos is going to kill John. I heard a rumor that someone dies in the next few weeks. my money is on Johnny boy. And Susan, she lands her man, and finally lands better, less stringy hair. Go you!
I can't get enough. I NEED more of this show!
Best. Halloween. Costume. Ever.
"Every year I go as a Venetian blind. I wear a shirt that says Venice, sunglasses, and I carry a cane!"--Matthew Perry
mmm...double o'ewan...
It seems that Ewan McGregor is 'in negotiations' to star as 007 in the next Bond film.
It's still early days, and this is, of course, only a rumor, but, here's hoping this rumor is true!

Ewan as James Bond. Delish.

and, might I add, he'll look much better in a tux than he does in a robe (even if he does have a lightsaber...) have you seen the trailer for the new Star Wars? Poor Ewan looks so hairy...
I never in my life wanted to smack a child... much as i wanted to hit this child at the bank!

I was standing in line and this mother was there with her two daughters - i'm guessing they were about 12 and 9. The older daughter was making a huge fuss, saying things like, "you promised we'd be home by 4, and look, it's already 4:30. we are never going to get home. why couldn't you just drop us off? I don't have time for this! I have a music test tomorrow! I can't believe you made us come here."

The mom just smiled, and pretended that she didn't know the child. (good for her - I'm sure she wished she didn't know her. people were staring)

The younger daughter says, "Did you buy kiwis for us?"
Mom answers, "No! I'm so sorry, i forgot. I'll pick them up tomorrrow."
Rudey says, "See! She never buys anything good for us. She only thinks about herself and not us! You don't care about us! I can't believe you didn't buy the kiwis!" at this point, she's screaming and huffing and carrying on.

The mom is still smiling, but you can see that she's getting agitated.

younger daughter chimes in, "it's okay, Mommy, we can wait for the kiwis."
Older daughter, "because you didn't buy the kiwis, we are watching tv when we get home."
Mom, "no, you are doing your homework when you get home, don't you have a music test tomorrow?"
Rudey, "I'm doing my homework in front of the tv and i don't care what you say about it! And I'm going to fail my music test of purpose and I'm going to blame it all on you because you made me stand for a hundred years in this bank, when i could be at home. I can't believe you took us here."

This is not a joke. This is exactly the way it went down.
I seriously wanted to turn around and give that girl a good punch in the face. But, i restrained myself. And felt pity for that mother, who probably wanted to do the exact same thing.

**** a little disclaimer for my dear readers. i have not ever, and would never, hit a child. ever. not my child. or anyone else's child. this is meant to be funny.
Monday, November 08, 2004
Tasty Tidbit
The boss' name on My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss, Mr. N. Paul Todd, is an anagram for Donald Trump.
can't stop laughing....
ORLANDO, Fla. (AP) A 6-year-old girl brought more than $1,000 worth of crack to school, and her mother claimed the child must have gotten it while trick-or-treating.

The first-grader was suspended from Tangelo Park Elementary. Her mother is under investigation.

School officials sent a letter home to parents Thursday, explaining how an anti-drug campaign led another student to recognize the more than a dozen pieces of crack.

(from the AP)
It's no Opry Mills....or Gurnee Mills for that matter...
...but we've now got our own "Mills" in Canada....we've got...drumroll please....Vaughan Mills.

There are several stores that are at all the Mills - American Eagle, Children's Place, Nike Factory Store. Unfortunately, this is pretty much where the similarities end.

There is no: Banana, Gap, Carters, Oshkosh, Bath and Body Works, Ann Taylor....

And where are they, you ask?
They all pulled out at the last minute. crap.

Well, the good news is that i was able to find some good deals on Canadian clothing - i got an amazing suit at Femme de Carriere and some great shirts and sweaters at Tristan for really cheap...but we already have Femme and Tristan outlets in the city. I only need to drive to Colussus and we have an entire strip of Canadian outlets. Who needs more of those?


to put it bluntly, canadian sales suck! at my Old Navy at the promenade mall, I watch as a sweater i want to buy for Emily starts at $48 dollars. In a few weeks, it goes down to 34.99. Great deal! then i watch as a few weeks later, it goes all the way down to $29.99. skippy! hooray! all Canadians race out to buy the sweater at the $30 dollar steal! But, you have to act quickly, because usually, by the time it reaches the cheap price, there are only sizes 3-6 months left, and then you are kicking yourself for not buying it when it was $34.99.

now, had this been my Old Navy in Milwaukee, it would have likely gone like this. The sweater would start at $39. it would stay on the shelf until it goes down to $19.99, then $12.99, then $9.99. then i would pick it up for $6.99, and I'm happy because they still have the sweater in every size.

Do you see the difference?
Typical Tara....

you know you want to click here to see Tara Reid's not-so-family-friendly display at P Diddy's Ball.....

from the New York Post:

As paparazzi clicked away merrily, an oblivious Reid continued to pose. But her smile turned into a grimace when she realized her breast was exposed after a handler ran over and frantically pushed her fallen strap back onto her shoulder.

"I took off my jacket and my strap fell off. It was awful. The photographers were like lunatics — high-fiving each other in front of me. It was so embarrassing. There were so many paparazzi and the flashbulbs were going off, I couldn't see anything."

"I didn't even know what was happening. I was like, 'It's not nice to take a picture like that. Please don't print the picture,' but they just laughed."

and this just in!! Paris strikes back and challenges Tara Reid in the "who can be the skankiest celebrity" contest. Click here to see Paris in all her glory.

****don't say I didn't warn you, Eric, in case you are still reading. You might not want to take a peek.
What everyone needs on a Monday morning...

During the shooting of Ocean's Twelve in Italy, Brad Pitt told the crew that George Clooney wanted to be called by his character's name, Danny Ocean. It took a while for Clooney to catch on, but once he did, he made sure to get back at his co-star.

"Brad was sitting in his car and George kind of tapped the car with his hand
and said 'All right, take care,'" Matt Damon tells Cosmopolitan. "When he
pulled his hand away, he's left a bumper sticker that read 'Small Penis
Onboard.' So Brad drove through rush-hour traffic in L.A. with it, and all
these people were looking at him and waving."

Maybe he actually is hung like a hamster...
Thursday, November 04, 2004
I'm tango-ed out, forever!!
So, last night, I went to see the play, Forever Tango. We got free tickets from my friend Michelle's mom, so, without any of the four of us having ANY clue what we were going to see, we ventured downtown last night.

We left quite early, and it's a good thing we did, because we went held up for 2 reasons. The first was the ass in the pacifica. She was driving in the right-hand lane, that she knew was about to end, and tried to weasel her way in in front of Michelle. Michelle, who stood her ground, did not let the bugger in. Go Mich! But, the lady wanted revenge, so she drove up really quickly behind us and then cut Michelle off! The nerve! What a rudey-pattotie! And then there was the old man with the cane walking down the middle of Spadina, completely oblivious to everything around him, including the traffic. So, Mich slammed on the brakes and we waited for the man to reach the other side safely. CRAZY

Well, that was the most entertaining thing about the evening. The play, turned out to be a bunch of people dancing the tango. and that was it. no plot. no story. no singing. JUST DANCING. we left at intermission and headed for second cup.

We had a lot of fun - - even if the play was crap. Because at the end of the day, free tickets are free tickets!!!
Celeb News...
~~~ Is she or isn't she? That's the big question of the day. Shar Jackson's been heard saying that she is. And the word from her spokesperson is a very unconvincing, "As far as we know, Britney is not pregnant." Hmm...rather curious.

~~~ Is she or isn't she?

Oh, Maggie, always looking so lumpy. I hope she is supposed to be preggers in this movie, and that's just a really really bad fake belly.

~~~ California here we come! I am sooooo super excited for tonight's season premiere of The OC. When we last saw them, Ryan was in Chino and Seth was off on his yacht. ooh...The show that made Orange County the place to be is about to make thursday the night to watch..."

Okay...I can't for the life of me understand how this fuggly guy, who was once the guy who got between teen queens Lindsay Lohan and Hillary Duff, is dating Hawaiian Tropic model Monique Decormier, who, by the way, is 21. What is wrong with these girls?

Question of the Day
Why is it that every time I put on lip gloss, I forget that as soon as i walk outside, my hair is going to stick to my lips?

Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Kerry concedes...

Democratic Sen. John Kerry phoned President Bush on Wednesday to concede the presidential election, aides in both camps said.

A Kerry adviser said the campaign had concluded that the too-close-to-call battleground state of Ohio was not going to come through for the Democrats.

The adviser said there was no way to gain votes on Bush without an "exhaustive fight," something that would have "further divided this country."
I'm Super Pissed Off This Morning!
I absolutely HATE Blogger. I'm thinking of moving. It drives me crazy when i sit down and write a really long blog entry (about the election, of course) and then when I click on publish, it completely erases the entire entry. argh!

Since I don't have the time or the energy to retype the entire thing....I will add a shortened version of my rant about provisional ballots in Ohio.

For those of you who don't know, there are three states that are still up in the air. New Mexico and Iowa and Ohio. Because these three states have yet to declare a winner, neither Bush nor Kerry has the necessary 270 electoral votes to win the election.

In Ohio, where dub-ya is winning by more than 136,000 votes, he can't be declared the winner because of some 250,000 uncounted provisional ballots.

What? Provisional who?

Provisional ballots are punch cards given to voters in Ohio who show up at the correct polling place and are not listed on the voters' list because they have moved or due to clerical errors. The votes are set aside in sealed envelopes to be counted along with absentee ballots.

"The vote count in Ohio has not been completed,'' said Mary Beth Cahill, Mr. Kerry's campaign manager. "There are more than 250,000 remaining votes to be counted. We believe when they are, John Kerry will win Ohio."

White House Chief of Staff Andrew Card, though, has said that Bush has won this election. He already has won the popular vote by more than 3.7 million votes, and he has said that Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell told him that the President's vote margin was a "statistically insurmountable lead, even after provisional ballots are considered."

While I'm unhappy of a George W. Bush victory, since I voted for John Kerry, I am willing to admit that he has won. Just let him claim his victory so we can move on from this. Who the heck wants a repeat of 2000's chad debacle? Who wants to sit around for weeks while extra ballots are counted and recounted? Put us all out of our misery already...

Tuesday, November 02, 2004
Something to Bong About
I can't believe some of the mothers out there!
This wacked-out woman in Montana let her 18-month-old daughter use a bong to smoke marijuana. What. the. hell.

Skirt Update!!
for those of you who were worried about my curious skirt losing incident last week, i found my skirt!! It had fallen between the passenger side door and seat. i was so happy when i found it.

Well, that's my good news of the day!
Happy Election Day
I hope you all are out there voting today!!!!!
If not, i'll have to come over there and kick all your asses.


oh, it's also a really good day because it's my son's 2nd birthday! Happy Birthday Josh Josh. :)
Monday, November 01, 2004
A Little Bit of Funny-ness
Hugh Grant was on Oprah plugging his new movie, "Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason." When asked about his Notting Hill co-star, THE Julia Roberts, he quipped, "[she's]very big-mouthed! Literally, physically, she has a very big mouth. It is a very big mouth. When I was kissing her I was aware of a faint echo."

Honestly, what is the point of drinking coffee if there's no coffee in your coffee??

Every morning, I get the same's usually whatever the flavoured one is: french vanilla, vanilla hazelnut, irish cream, etc. i put a little milk and one equal.

This morning, the guy next to me put 18% cream and 4 sugars into his coffee. And i swear, no joke, it wasn't even coffee-color once it was was like an off-white/ecru-y color.
That's What I'm Talkin' About
Let's Go Buffalo!!

Okay, I'm back from my trip to the Bills game. It was freezing, raining sideways through the entire game...but it was still amazing! We had the best time. We went with our friends Ephraim and Tova and just had a blast.

Here's a view of the ominous weather:

We brought a bbq and tailgated in the parking lot with all the other Buffalonians (is that the right word for them?). They are crazy die-hard fans. some of them even looked like they had been there all night. They were cooking, and playing football, and all decked out, head to toe, in Bills gear. And since it was Halloween, there were a whole bunch of interesting costumes...

I figured...when in I borrowed a hat and jersey from my friend Howie (who happens to be from Buffalo) that i wore over a t-shirt, long sleeved shirt, sweatshirt, and jacket. Man, it was cold!!

It was raining through the entire game, but we figured, what the heck, we are already wet we stayed. It was a really good game too! Buffalo won - 38-14. At least we can say that they won on the day we were there....since they don't seem to be winning all that much these days...

and the Packers won i'm quite happy this morning :)

I'm a displaced American writer, mom, and wife living in Canada who muses about my life, my kids, my tv watching and my slight obsession with celebrities.
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Reading Lolita in Tehran * Azar Nafisi
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close * Jonathan Safran Foer
i bet you look good on the dance floor * arctic monkeys
the skin of my yellow country teeth * clap your hands say yeah
chasing cars * snow patrol
movie script ending * death cab for cutie
anthems for a 17-year-old girl * broken social scene
all these things that I've done * the killers
one more night (your ex-lover remains dead) * stars
a little less 16 candles a little more touch me * fall out boy
the great salt lake * band of horses
october, first account * be your own pet
mushaboom * feist
letter from an occupant * new pornographers

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